Think about the ideal life you

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09.08.2018 @ 02.08

What kind of suitcases [url=www.cheapsoccerjerse… AC Milan Jerseys[/url] , what packing methods? What you need to know is what to pack! When you're getting ready for your trip, the best thing to do is to start a packing list.

What you need to put on that list will depend on your destination and your travel style. I mean, if you're going to a tropical country, what you'll need to pack will be completely different from if you're going to Antarctica.... though it might surprise you that we'd recommend a swimsuit in either case.

You'd always take a swimsuit to a tropical beach, but there are hot springs on Deception Island in the Antarctic Peninsula where you can swim... and who wouldn't want bragging rights about swimming in Antarctica!

So are you going to be touring cities or going on safari; getting pampered at a spa or visiting a dude ranch? You can pack light in any case, you just need to adjust your wardrobe. If you're going on a scuba diving trip and taking your own equipment... well, you probably know what you need to take... and that you won't be packing light!

It takes some planning to pack with today's security alerts, but if you can pack everything in carry-on luggage, you can avoid airline baggage fees.

For women, here's what I take.... some combination of five long and short sleeved blouses depending on the climate of our destination. Two pairs of slacks and one skirt for dress up. A light pull over sweater and an outer sweater. One nightgown, underwear for 5 days and a swimsuit. Two pairs of shoes and three or four pairs of socks.

For men... again, some combination of five long and short sleeved shirts. Two pairs of long pants. Shorts if expecting warm weather. Pull over sweater. A swim suit. Underwear for five days. Two pairs of shoes and three or four pairs of socks.

You really don't need many more clothes than that. Who cares if you wear the same things over and over... you're on the move... you will never see most of these people again. Wash things out as you travel. Try to find fabrics that drip dry well.

What to pack beyond your clothes? Prescription medications... enough for your trip and a few days extra. Deodorant, aspirin, antacids and cold tablets. Toothpaste and toothbrushes. Shampoo and necessary cosmetics.

Sunglasses and sunscreen. A wide brimmed hat if you will be in the sun, and an umbrella in case of rain. And insect repellent if needed.

A travel alarm clock is always useful. A small daypack can give you room to expand once your arrive. Take a camera with plenty of batteries or a charger. Maybe binoculars. A curling iron for women, a razor for men.... and adaptors for those funny foreign plugs.

We always advise to think carefully before you carry a lot of electronics. If you're busy touring around, you may not have time to use that laptop computer much... and do you really want to carry it? Check to see if your cell phone even works where you're going.... or if it does, if you can afford to use it!

Deciding what to pack isn't hard... most people need to concentrate on what NOT to pack. Make your packing list... then stick with it. If there is something you really do forget to pack... you can probably get it there.


As a coach working with gays and lesbians who are coming out in midlife, I am often called upon to help people sort out whether to stay in or leave their heterosexual marriage. It's not an easy question to answer. Things to consider are the individuals' feelings toward their spouse, the existence of another lover, their ability to remain monogamous in a heterosexual union, their dedication to their marriage vows and the basic strength of the marriage. With probing and discussion, the answer usually becomes obvious to the client over time. Here are some questions you need to ask yourself if you are in this situation:

Your spouse. Are you in love with your husband or wife? What is the nature of the love you share? Is it passionate, romantic love or is it the love of respect and admiration? If it's the latter will that be enough to sustain you over time? Is your spouse expressing ful
fillment in the marriage or does she feel something is "not right?"

Your lover. Have you started seeing someone outside of the marriage? How important is that person in your life? Can you envision a future with your lover? Does she share that vision? Would you be willing to give up your lover for the sake of the marriage?

Monogamy. Can you be emotionally and sexually satisfied in the marriage? Do you feel compelled to search for sex outside of the marriage? Does your spouse know this and what is their reaction? Do you feel guilty when you think or act on this?

Marriage vows. Are you extremely religious? To what lengths are you able to go to maintain your vows? Does your spouse share these views? Are you able to consider an open marriage with your spouse and reconcile this with your beliefs?

Strength of the marriage. Other than your sexual orientation, how are other areas of the marriage? Do you have arguments often? If so, what do you argue about? Can these issues be resolved or are they intractable? If you were not gay or lesbian, would you be considering a divorce over these issues?

If you are gay or lesbian and are in a marriage, you may be struggling with the decision to stay or leave. Allow yourself time to think it through, talk with your spouse, and seek counseling or coaching to help you. Consider alternative lifestyle options. Think about the ideal life you would like to be leading in 5 years. Most of all, be honest with yourself and with your spouse. The answer lies in your heart, waiting to be uncovered.

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